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Thank Goodness, Your 2014 Winter Break Horoscopes Are Here

Sagittarius 

Saturn is moving out of the scope of Scorpio and into Sagittarius which means that this month will be a time of learning and gathering new information. Cramming for finals much? If you haven’t learned anything in your accounting class this semester now is a good time to teach yourself everything two days before the final.

Capricorn 

This winter break is the perfect time to reboot your system. The stars predict a financial upwind (returning to an old job over break maybe?) and a boost of social energy. You’ll be the life of the party this holiday season, even if that means dancing with your smelly drunk uncle at your family Christmas party.

Aquarius 

The end of the semester has you really really stressed. Like so stressed that you walked to your class in the library with your shirt on inside out. Take it easy!! Finals are rough for everyone so make sure to take a study break and watch some Netflix or go to the gym. After Dec. 15th all your stress will be gone and it’ll be Christmas!!! Yay!!!!

Pisces 

This winter break will present a lot of business opportunities for you, like a cool internship or returning to a past job at home. It’ll suck to choose between working/being an adult and kicking it with your old squad from high school, but you gotta do what you gotta do. Not seeing Hunger Games in the theater will be a drag but think about all of the ca$h you’ll be making.

Aries

Are you traveling this break? December and January are good months for you to get on a plane and go somewhere that isn’t here. It’ll be fun and relaxing plus you’ll take a bomb new profile picture that will get like over eighty likes on Facebook.

Taurus

<3 <3 <3 Love is in the air for Taurus this Christmas. Put mistletoe everywhere because you’ll be hooking up with hotties left and right. That guy from high school? He’s down. Basketball player you met last weekend? He wants the booty. Check out guy at Shaw’s? Yup. Get the picture?

Gemini

Relationships and commitment are very crucial this month. It’s time to make it official and change your relationship status on Facebook from “it’s complicated” to “in a relationship.” If bae isn’t down to commit for the long haul toss them to the curb. Emmanuel is a small school but Boston is a humongous city. If they’re really worth it they’ll want to publicly date you…

Cancer

You’ve been sick since Halloween and not showing any signs of recovery. The MBTA has you constantly showing flu symptoms and wiping your nose on your sleeve. When you go home for winter break park it in bed and focus on healing. Skip out on all the X-mas treats and eat hummus or something like that. You should be good as new for New Year’s Eve (just in time to get another cold from kissing a stranger outside the gas station).

Leo

NO SCHOOL WOOOOO!!!!! You’re so pumped about Christmas vacation that you are willing to do anything if it sounds fun. You’re not on campus anymore, you’re back in your sleepy hometown so try being a little cautious when choosing who you hook up with. They might think you want to get married and have kids and that’s really intense and scary. So check yo’ self before you get rowdy from too much egg-nog.

Virgo

Family is all you can think about this break. You missed them so much when you were away at school and you finally get to see them! Home-cooked meals are so much better than food from the JYC. If you do your chores and help your mom make a Christmas feast maybe you’ll see some Fenway cash with your name on it under the tree. (or the menorah idk if ur jewish)

Libra

Now is a good time to go Christmas shopping at the Pru or Quincy Market in your spare time before finals. You’ll be inspired to buy the perfect gifts for your whole family/all your friends and when they open it they’ll be like “OH MY GOD THIS IS THE BEST X-MAS EVERRRRRR.” ps don’t forget to buy yourself a little something special at Victoria’s Secret 😉

Scorpio

Scorpios are brooding and mysterious, and they have reason to be because 2014 has been a harsh year for them. They’ve grown up a lot and adjusted to life at Emmanuel but it wasn’t easy. Your third semester of college is almost over so give yourself a pat on the back and hibernate for a while. You earned it, sport.

Posted by on December 2, 2014. Filed under Around Campus. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

One Response to Thank Goodness, Your 2014 Winter Break Horoscopes Are Here

  1. Anna Topping

    December 2, 2014 at 12:12 pm

    Reblogged this on Is This Real Life?.